After Life

I wake. 6:50am. The first day of spring. Somehow I have made it through the entire winter without a single cold or even so much as a sniffle. I am either dead or no longer susceptible. My immune system has no reason whatsoever to be this sturdy. Perhaps I am not as frail as all that.

I still have a trace of the swollen lymph node in my neck that I had a couple of weeks ago. My inner hypochondriac thinks I am dying at all times, and of course, in absolute terms this is always the case. The matter is not one of if, but rather one of when.

When will we die?

I guess one won't really know when one has died, unless there actually happens to be an afterlife. One minute you are alive or dying, and then suddenly you are dead, and all hell breaks loose for those who care about you. They will feel a terrible loss; one hopes.

But do we also have to stick around for that? Will we have to witness all the crying and sobbing of our "love ones" from some omniscient, above it all, ghost-like vantage point? Or in some cases, a lack of sadness or complete indifference over our departing, or even worse a long awaited relief for some of those we leave behind? "Thank God he's finally dead!" they may exclaim. "That old fart was a big pain in my ass my whole life!" 

Oh, please, don't be shocked, it happens.

Do you want to have an after life?

I don't. 

Not for the crying and not for the rest of it. No, death is only perfect if it promises complete oblivion. Life after death would just be more of the same; more awareness of this or that. If there is a great creator, then I would hope it has the sense to know when enough is enough...although looking around at the universe, the shear vastness of it all, I have my doubts as to whether the creator had any sense of proportion whatsoever. 

Obviously "it" was found of things, even frivolous things. Look at me, I am living proof of that.

And so a new day beings...all tongue in check and rises from the dead again.